Season 3, Episode 13;Host:Art Garfunkel, with Stephen Bishop and Andy Kaufman.

Aired March 11, 1978.

Network disclaimer:“Jacques Cousteau Gets an Undersea Enema” Don Pardo announces that “Jacques Cousteau Gets an Undersea Enema” will not be seen tonight, so that NBC can present the following special program."

Cold opening:"Modern Crimes" We open with a silent movie titled Modern Crimes. In Switzerland two grave robbers (Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi) are carrying a body wrapped in a rug. When they drop the rug, a body (Gilda Radner) falls out that appears to be the "Little Tramp" character made famous by Charlie Chaplin.

They're spotted by a policeman (Bill Murray), so they pretend the Little Tramp is still alive. When the cop tell them to move on, the Tramp comes to life and says (silently) "Live, from New York, it's Saturday Night!"

Monologue:"Wonderful World"
In lieu of the usual monologue, host Art Garfunkel sings "Wonderful World," which was originally recorded and written by Sam Cooke. Released a single on April 14, 1960, it peaked at #12 on Billboard's Hot 100 and #2 on the R&B chart.

Garfunkel's recording of the song appeared on his 1977 album Watermark. It was released as a single in January1978 and reached #17. 

His song is interrupted when a speaker feeds back. Art tries to resume the song, but John Belushi comes onstage and berates NBC for having worn out speakers. John continues to rip the network for how it treats SNL and encourages Garfunkel to walk off in protest. When Art says the speaker is no big deal, Belushi turns his anger at Garfunkel and accuses him of selling out.

John then walks off in disgust and Art finishes "Wonderful World."

Commercial:"Kromega III Watch" Repeat from Season 3, episode 1.

Talk show:"Tomorrow show with Tom Snyder"
Tom Snyder (Aykroyd) interviews a man who claims to be a battered husband. The man is kept shrouded in darkness to hide his identity. 

The interview goes off the rails when Snyder accidently calls the man by his real name and holds up a photo of the battering victim.

Stephen Bishop:"On And On" Stephen Bishop performs "On And On," which was the leadoff track on his 1976 album Careless.

"On And On" was issued as a single in May 1977 and reached #11 on the Hot 100 and #2 on Billboard's Easy Listening chart.

"Miracle In Chicago": In a Chicago Irish pub, the late mayor of Chicago, Richard J. Daly (Belushi) comes back from the dead. He offers to help the pub's owner (Aykroyd) get more Irish songs on the pub's jukebox in time for St. Patrick's Day.

"Kiss Concert"
Outside of a Kiss concert, a roadie (Belushi) and a security guard (Garrett Morris) deal with a crowd of people who are trying to get backstage. If they're not on the guest list, they're not allowed to enter. Some of them have outrageous stories about how they know members of Kiss. 

"Weekend Update"
Anchors Jane Curtin and Dan Aykroyd report on the top news stories of the day.

Elizabeth Taylor was force-fed for charity.

Actor/director Orson Welles has been injured in a skiing accident.

Science Editor Dr. Garrett Morris reports on a new drug that can save people who suffer from phlebitis. 

Movie critic Bill Murray reviews Coming Home. Murray says the film convinced him that the Vietnam War was "a mistake."

Art Garfunkel:"All I Know," "Scarborough Fair"
The host sings "All I Know," written by Jimmy Webb. It first appeared on Garfunkel's 1973 album Angel Clare. "All I Know" reached #9 on the Hot 100 and #1 on the Adult Contemporary chart. 

Garfunkel follows that up with the traditional English folk song "Scarborough Fair." This song has been covered many artists, but Simon and Garfunkel recorded the most successful version. "Scarborough Fair" was the lead track on Simon & Garfunkel's 1966 album Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme.

It was released as a single in February1968 after it appeared on the soundtrack of The Graduate. The song peaked at #11 in the U.S..

Talk show:"Looks At Books" Jane Curtin interviews Lisa Loopner (Radner) and Todd LaBounta (Murray), co-authors of the book Whatever Happened To The Class of '77. The book covers what has happened to members of their graduating class since the previous June.

Schiller's Reel:"Don't Look Back In Anger" Many years in the future, an aged John Belushi visits The Not-Ready For Primetime Cemetery, where the cast of Saturday Night Live is buried. He recounts how they all died and wonders why he's the last one left alive.

Andy Kaufman:"The Great Gatsby" Andy Kaufman tells the audience that instead of performing stand-up comedy, he will read The Great Gatsby aloud from the beginning.

The crowd quickly gets bored and boos Kaufman. He tells them quiet down because he has "a long way to go."

Commercial:"The Looking For Mr. Goodbar Sleepytime Playset" A girl (Radner) plays with The Looking For Mr. Goodbar Sleepytime Playset. The toy promises that kids "can recreate the grim reality of Judith Rossner’s bleak novel of hopelessness and despair right in her very own bedroom, alone at night!"

Art Garfunkel:"Crying In My Sleep"
Garfunkel performs "Crying In My Sleep," the leadoff track on his Watermark album.

Goodnights: Garfunkel says "that's all the time we have, so thank you, goodnight."

Notes about this episode:

The "Modern Crimes" opening is a reference to the real theft of Charlie Chaplin's body. On March 1, Chaplin's coffin was stolen and held for a $600,000 ransom. The two thieves were arrested and led police to where they had buried the coffin.

During "Kiss Concert," Dan Aykroyd briefly appears wearing a Kiss costume and makeup. It happens so quickly that I couldn't get a very good screencap.

However, I found this rehearsal photo (taken by Lynn Goldsmith) that shows Aykroyd backstage in costume.

What stands out: "Modern Crimes"-This silent film parody is a great way to open the show. Having "Live from New York" mouthed silently by Gilda Radner is a nice touch. "Don't Look Back In Anger"-A great film by Tom Schiller and an excellent performance by John Belushi (who is unrecognizable in old man makeup). Of course Belushi was the first SNL cast member to die, which makes this film even more poignant today.

Andy Kaufman-His reading of The Great Gatsby is a perfect example of Kaufman's "anti-comedy" comedy. What doesn't work: Too much music-Art Garfunkel has a great voice ("Scarborough Fair" is particularly good here), but there are five songs performed on this episode. That feels like at least one too many. And the show closes with a downbeat song, which ends the show on a sad note. With Garfunkel hosting, I don't think this episode needed an additional musical guest in Stephen Bishop. I would have preferred more sketches.

J.A. Morris' rating: This episode features several solid sketches and a great short film, but the number of songs keeps it from getting a higher rating:

3 stars.

Season 3, episode 12;Host:O.J. Simpson, with Ashford & Simpson

Aired February 25, 1978.

Network disclaimer:
Don Pardo announces that James At 16 Marries Roman Polanski will not be seen tonight so that NBC may present the following special program."

Cold opening: Gilda Radner reads and answers questions submitted by the audience. The first question, from a man named Kevin asks “Do you ever have trouble coming up with an opening for the show?” Gilda says they had trouble this week, hence her reading audience questions.

Gilda reads more questions, all submitted by members of the audience named "Kevin." The final inquiry asks “Gilda, settle a bet – my wife, Kevin, says you always start the show with the words ‘Give me all your hot monkey love,’ and I say she’s wrong.” Radner says that "Kevin's wife" Kevin is incorrect, the show always opens with "Live from New York, it's Saturday Night!," and the credits roll.

Monologue:"O.J.’s life story"

Host O.J. Simpson (wearing a “Conehead” cone) tells the story of how he became a football star. He says he wanted to host SNL ever since he saw Richard Pryor host. O.J. says that if he fails tonight, he'll have to go back to being a football player, commercial pitchman and movie star.

“Samurai Night Fever”

Written by Alan Zweibel and John Belushi.

A Brooklyn Samurai named Tony (John Belushi) who lives to dance at the disco faces pressure to conform from his parents. They wish Tony was more like his older brother Joe (Simpson).

However, when Joe returns home, he fears he will disappoint the parents when he tells them he no longer wants to be Black. Tony invites Joe to join him for a night of disco dancing.

Tony puts on an amazing display of dancing at the disco.

“Great Moments In Sports”
O.J. introduces and narrates a show that tells the story about Babe Ruth’s (Belushi) visit to a dying young boy (Garrett Morris). The Babe promises to hit a home run to honor the boy in his next game. Unfortunately, Ruth may be unable to fulfill his promise.

 

Asford & Simpson:"So So Satisfied"
Ashford & Simpson perform "So So Satisfied," the title track to their 1977 album. 

This song reached #27 the Billboard R&B chart. 

Commercial:”Mohawk Master”
A pitchman (Dan Aykroyd) promotes the Mowhawk Master, an electric razor specifically designed to give mohawk haircuts.

Commercial For NBC’s Big Event:"The Raid On Nicosia"
A promo for a TV movie, based on the Lanarca Airport raid, features an all-star cast, including Sherman Hemsley (Morris) as Egyptian President Anwar Sadat.

“Weekend Update”
Anchors Jane Curtin and Day Aykroyd report on the events of the day.

Stargazer Bill Murray discusses the recent Oscar nominations and how Woody Allen was nominated for 3 Oscars, just like Orson Welles in 1940. Murray tells Allen not to let his nominations give him a "swell head."

Correspondent Laraine Newman makes history as the first woman to report from an NFL locker room, where she interviews O.J. Simpson.

Consumer Reporter Roseanne Roseannadanna receives a letter that asks how to prevent dental diseases.

Her "report" devolves into observations about pieces of food getting caught in her teeth and removing them with matchbook covers, much to Curtin's chagrin.

“O.J.’s rushing record”
O.J. and a few friends watch a football game, where Walter Payton is threatening to break Simpson’s single-season rushing record. As Payton gets closer to the record, O.J. uses a “Walton Payton voodoo doll” to prevent his record from being broken.

“The Franken and Davis Show”
Tom Davis says that his partner Al Franken has a malignant brain tumor. However, Al wants to perform one last time before the tumor kills him. Unfortunately, due to his ill health, Franken struggles to get through his stand-up routine. 

Movie trailer:"Mandingo II"
Written by Al Franken and Tom Davis.
This sequel to Mandingo presents a world of "violence, cruelty, greed, and lust." The trailer emphasizes the film's sex scenes.

“E. Buzz Miller’s Animal Kingdom”
Written by Dan Aykroyd and Tom Davis.
Pornographer E. Buzz Miller (Aykroyd) shows films of animals mating. Miller and his girlfriend Christy Christina (Newman) comment on the films.

Commercial:"Hertz Rent-A-Car"
O.J. rushes through an airport to the Hertz Rent-A-Car counter. Unfortunately, he finds that his car has already been rented to someone else.

Ashford & Simpson:"Don't Cost You Nothing"
This song appeared on Ashford & Simpson's 1977 album Send It. "Don't Cost You Nothing" peaked at #10 on the R&B chart.

“Celebrity Battle of the Sexes & Races”
In an inter-racial and inter-gender athletic competition, Black men, represented by O.J. and Leon Spinks (Morris)...

...face off against Sandy Duncan (Newman) and Marie Osmond (Radner). The Black men’s team dominates every event. 

Goodnights:
Simpson, flanked by Radner and Newman, still in costume, says “well, that’s all for tonight, thanks for joining us,” and the credits roll. 

Notes about this episode:

I approached this episode with a bit of trepidation, considering that today O.J. Simpson is best known for being a murder suspect and a convicted criminal. However, part of this blog is transporting myself back to the 1970s, when Simpson was known as a superstar athlete, pitchman and occasional actor. So I will review the episode on that basis.

I found two promos for this episode. The first features Simpson:

The other features Gilda Radner as Roseanne Roseannadanna:

The "network disclaimer" at the beginning of the episode mentions James at 16. That was a short-lived NBC series that centered on the life of a teenage boy. 

Classic moment:
"Samurai Night Fever"-John Belushi is amazing in this sketch, dancing and cartwheeling all over the stage. He also does a nice job combining his "Samurai" voice with a John Travolta imitation. This sketch is one of Belushi's greatest moments on SNL.

What stands out:
Gilda Radner's cold opening-This "audience questions" sketch shows how charming Radner could be while simultaneously being very funny. 

"E. Buzz Miller's Animal Kingdom"-Aykroyd and Newman are hilarious in this sketch. "Animal Kingdom" has (rightly) been featured in various "Best Of" compilations.

Roseanne Roseannadanna's report-Radner is great here, I don't want to spoil it by saying more. It's worth mentioning that the letter she reads is from "Bob Van Ry," whereas her letters were usually sent by "Richard Fader." In reality, Bob Van Ry was Saturday Night Live's stage manager from 1975 to his retirement in 2000.

"Mohawk Master"-One of Dan Aykroyd's best and most memorable pitchmen. It's also a nice acknowledgment of the punk scene of the time. 

What doesn't work:

O.J.'s monologue-Simpson's story about his beginnings goes on too long isn't very funny.

J.A. Morris' rating:
This a very good episode in spite of Simpson's presence. The aforementioned sketches make it worth watching. 

.5

Three and a half stars.